Healing Through Letting Go

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Life Changing Benefits of Letting Go

Stress. Pressure. Fears. False beliefs. What do all of these serve? They cloud our judgement, create mental, emotional and physical pain and even worse, ruin our lives.

But yet, we find it so hard to just LET GO!

Letting go means being willing to allow life to carry you to a new place, even a deeper more true rendition of self. Holding on means trying to push life into the place of your making or be damned.

Letting go is not easy and many spend their whole lives living in the in-between of joy, peace and love because of what blocks these wonderful, positive, life-bearing emotions are stonewalled by baggage.

You can only benefit from releasing what doesn’t serve you. For you and those you love, you will be happier and healthier for it.

The way then to let go of emotional pain is through acceptance and expression. When we can learn to accept that sometimes ‘bad’ things happen, tragedies occur, people will say and do unkind things to us, just like we will occasionally say and do unkind things to others, then we’ve taken a great step forward. Life is full of experiences and they’re not all pleasant. Acknowledgment of this is liberation!

The next step is to express our feelings. When something happens that causes us to experience negative feelings, we need to talk about it. When someone hurts us, forgive them. I think this is perhaps the greatest mark of a person’s character … their ability to forgive. Forgiveness is not easy, but as the old axiom goes, it is a gift you give yourself. Something that helps in the forgiveness process is to remember that everyone is doing the best they can with what they’ve learned. If someone has mistreated us, it’s because that’s what they’ve learned. They don’t feel good about themselves and they are not conscious of our true spiritual nature.

Letting go will lead to a more fulfilling, joy and peace-filled life

Gain confidence. When you let go of the things you hide behind, you will see how much your worth really is. It’s not about your looks, your possessions and your pride. It’s about who you are, your beliefs and how you treat people. Once you let go of being judged, you will allow confidence in it’s purest form to take up that space.

Gain health, physically. Let go of stress and trying to be perfect, to feel better. You cannot do it all! No one is Super Woman or Super Man. You are leading yourself down a road of physical dis-ease by trying to be the perfectionist, do-it-all wonder woman or man. Everything over time will manifest physically, good or bad. To feel healthy and vibrant, balance is key. Releasing the need to do it all and be perfect is essential to have a stress-free and physically healthy life.

Enjoy life more by making you a priority. When you let go of the thinking that ‘everyone and everything else is more important than me’, learn how to say ‘no’, and give yourself permission to love and pamper yourself, you gift yourself with more time allowing more peace and joy in. Maybe you will find time to take a class you always wanted to, see a friend you haven’t in some time, etc.

Tranquility and calm enter when you let go of time. We want it, need it, have to have it, done, said, closed, etc. NOW. Letting go of the expectations we set on ourselves (and others) for what we need by when we need it, reduces anxiety, tension and stress. Allowing things to unfold in divine timing requires the releasing of beliefs surrounding how much time something should take.

Peace to just Be. Releasing harmful, negative self-beliefs is one of the toughest things to do. Undermining and self-sabotage is Rule #1 in the playbook for ‘1 Million Ways to be Totally Unhappy and Unsuccessful’. What do you believe about yourself that is your own dark little secret? Yet you really know that it’s only your belief and not reality. These negative, self-sabotaging thoughts are the most difficult to reverse or pull from our psyche as we have believed them all our lives. To get rid of that one (or more) plaguing false belief, think of the peace you would experience.

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Letting Go Feels Better

Letting go means you are there for the world. Letting go is generous.

It comes from a kinder place, a place of deeper regard for yourself and others. It comes from a place that is grounded in an appreciation for the challenges of life for all of us.

Life always was and always will be short and imperfect. That is true for me, you and the other 7 billion people on the planet. It is true for all life forms. We are the only life form that seems to stomp around the planet trying to make someone pay for the arrangement. Unfortunately, the person or persons that we are trying to get to pay have no more control over the arrangement that you or I.

Things  to minimize and even avoid emotional pain

  • Focus on doing your best
  • Be kind
  • Act with integrity
  • Be honest
  • Behave responsibly
  • Eat healthy foods (eliminates guilt)

Experiencing emotional pain is part of the human experience. It’s unavoidable and it’s how we handle it that ultimately determines the quality of our personal experience.

Let Go Visualization

This visualization is to be used to release your emotional attachment of worry from the past and anxiety of the future… on anything in your life that no longer serves you.

The purpose of this visualization is to bring up some of that strong emotional experience now and release it. That way when it is triggered by an external event in the future it doesn’t contain the same charge therefore causing less destruction to your joy and causing less harm in your current relationships.

We all know the unconscious mind is very powerful and automates most of our day to day activities. The downside of the unconscious mind is that we tend to store up strong emotional experience in moments from our past. This emotional baggage then sits and waits to be triggered by certain external events causing us to relive the pain and suffering all over again.

When you let go of what no longer serves you, you create space for what’s meant to be.

If you are depressed you are living in the past, If you are anxious you are living in the future, If you are at Peace you are living in the present. ~ Lao Tzu

This Visualization

Embark on a short walk on a beach to refresh the way we are thinking, letting go of old ways of thinking and align with your well being.

For this visualization, you will select something in your life that is causing you worry, anxiety or overall making you feel down, to let go of. It can be something recent such as an argument with a spouse, coworker or friend. Or if you choose, you can pick something a little more serious from your past.

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Be conscious of your worries

Set aside 15 minutes each day where you allow yourself to focus on problems and fears — and then vow to let them go after the 15 minutes is up. Some people wear a rubber band on their wrist and “pop” the rubber band if they find themselves going into their “worry mode.” Do whatever you can to remind yourself to stop dwelling on worries.

Yesterday is history, Tomorrow is a mystery, Today is a gift that is why they call it the present.


Better Help is the worlds largest e-counceling platform

If you’re looking to improve the quality of your life. Whenever there is anything that interferes with your happiness or prevents you from achieving your goals, we may be able to help. We also have counselors who are specialized in specific issues, such as stress, anxiety, relationships, parenting, depression, addictions, eating, sleeping, trauma, anger, family conflicts, LGBT matters, grief, religion, self esteem and more.

Better Help is affordable, private online counseling. Anytime, anywhere. If you are looking for support in your area see how a nearby therapist can help.


Talk to a professional therapist

If you have continued challenges with letting go of worry and anxiety, a Psychological counseling can help you develop appropriate coping strategies to deal with issues that trigger excessive worrying. Psychological intervention can give you coping methods that you can use either within or outside other treatment programs. The therapist will help you identify what types of thoughts and beliefs cause the anxiety and then work with you to reduce them. The therapist can help you by suggesting ways that may help you change. But you have to be the one to make the changes. Therapy is only successful if you work on getting better.

Heal the Past, Live the Present, Dream the Future

The Let Go Visualization is a tool designed to work in conjunction with medical advise. There is great value in many drugs and treatment plans to treat illness, we encourage you to discuss using affirmative visualization in your treatment plan with your medical advisor.


The information on this site is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Please refer to our Medical Disclaimer for additional details.



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What reality are you creating for yourself?

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TedTalk by Isaac Lidsky, posted June 2016
Reality isn’t something you perceive; it’s something you create in your mind. Isaac Lidsky learned this profound lesson firsthand, when unexpected life circumstances yielded valuable insights. In this introspective, personal talk, he challenges us to let go of excuses, assumptions and fears, and accept the awesome responsibility of being the creators of our own reality.

Transcript:

When Dorothy was a little girl, she was fascinated by her goldfish. Her father explained to her that fish swim by quickly wagging their tails to propel themselves through the water. Without hesitation, little Dorothy responded, “Yes, Daddy, and fish swim backwards by wagging their heads.”

In her mind, it was a fact as true as any other. Fish swim backwards by wagging their heads. She believed it.

Our lives are full of fish swimming backwards. We make assumptions and faulty leaps of logic. We harbor bias. We know that we are right, and they are wrong. We fear the worst. We strive for unattainable perfection. We tell ourselves what we can and cannot do. In our minds, fish swim by in reverse frantically wagging their heads and we don’t even notice them.

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I’m going to tell you five facts about myself. One fact is not true. One: I graduated from Harvard at 19 with an honors degree in mathematics. Two: I currently run a construction company in Orlando. Three: I starred on a television sitcom. Four: I lost my sight to a rare genetic eye disease. Five: I served as a law clerk to two US Supreme Court justices. Which fact is not true? Actually, they’re all true. Yeah. They’re all true.

At this point, most people really only care about the television show.

I know this from experience. OK, so the show was NBC’s “Saved by the Bell: The New Class.” And I played Weasel Wyzell, who was the sort of dorky, nerdy character on the show, which made it a very major acting challenge for me as a 13-year-old boy.

Now, did you struggle with number four, my blindness? Why is that? We make assumptions about so-called disabilities. As a blind man, I confront others’ incorrect assumptions about my abilities every day. My point today is not about my blindness, however. It’s about my vision. Going blind taught me to live my life eyes wide open. It taught me to spot those backwards-swimming fish that our minds create. Going blind cast them into focus.

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What does it feel like to see? It’s immediate and passive. You open your eyes and there’s the world. Seeing is believing. Sight is truth. Right? Well, that’s what I thought.

Then, from age 12 to 25, my retinas progressively deteriorated. My sight became an increasingly bizarre carnival funhouse hall of mirrors and illusions. The salesperson I was relieved to spot in a store was really a mannequin. Reaching down to wash my hands, I suddenly saw it was a urinal I was touching, not a sink, when my fingers felt its true shape. A friend described the photograph in my hand, and only then I could see the image depicted. Objects appeared, morphed and disappeared in my reality. It was difficult and exhausting to see. I pieced together fragmented, transitory images, consciously analyzed the clues, searched for some logic in my crumbling kaleidoscope, until I saw nothing at all.

I learned that what we see is not universal truth. It is not objective reality. What we see is a unique, personal, virtual reality that is masterfully constructed by our brain.

Let me explain with a bit of amateur neuroscience. Your visual cortex takes up about 30 percent of your brain. That’s compared to approximately eight percent for touch and two to three percent for hearing. Every second, your eyes can send your visual cortex as many as two billion pieces of information. The rest of your body can send your brain only an additional billion. So sight is one third of your brain by volume and can claim about two thirds of your brain’s processing resources. It’s no surprise then that the illusion of sight is so compelling. But make no mistake about it: sight is an illusion.

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Here’s where it gets interesting. To create the experience of sight, your brain references your conceptual understanding of the world, other knowledge, your memories, opinions, emotions, mental attention. All of these things and far more are linked in your brain to your sight. These linkages work both ways, and usually occur subconsciously. So for example, what you see impacts how you feel, and the way you feel can literally change what you see. Numerous studies demonstrate this. If you are asked to estimate the walking speed of a man in a video, for example, your answer will be different if you’re told to think about cheetahs or turtles. A hill appears steeper if you’ve just exercised, and a landmark appears farther away if you’re wearing a heavy backpack. We have arrived at a fundamental contradiction. What you see is a complex mental construction of your own making, but you experience it passively as a direct representation of the world around you. You create your own reality, and you believe it. I believed mine until it broke apart. The deterioration of my eyes shattered the illusion.

You see, sight is just one way we shape our reality. We create our own realities in many other ways. Let’s take fear as just one example. Your fears distort your reality. Under the warped logic of fear, anything is better than the uncertain. Fear fills the void at all costs, passing off what you dread for what you know, offering up the worst in place of the ambiguous, substituting assumption for reason. Psychologists have a great term for it: awfulizing.

Right? Fear replaces the unknown with the awful. Now, fear is self-realizing. When you face the greatest need to look outside yourself and think critically, fear beats a retreat deep inside your mind, shrinking and distorting your view, drowning your capacity for critical thought with a flood of disruptive emotions. When you face a compelling opportunity to take action, fear lulls you into inaction, enticing you to passively watch its prophecies fulfill themselves.

When I was diagnosed with my blinding disease, I knew blindness would ruin my life. Blindness was a death sentence for my independence. It was the end of achievement for me. Blindness meant I would live an unremarkable life, small and sad, and likely alone. I knew it. This was a fiction born of my fears, but I believed it. It was a lie, but it was my reality, just like those backwards-swimming fish in little Dorothy’s mind. If I had not confronted the reality of my fear, I would have lived it. I am certain of that.

So how do you live your life eyes wide open? It is a learned discipline. It can be taught. It can be practiced. I will summarize very briefly.

Hold yourself accountable for every moment, every thought, every detail. See beyond your fears. Recognize your assumptions. Harness your internal strength. Silence your internal critic. Correct your misconceptions about luck and about success. Accept your strengths and your weaknesses, and understand the difference. Open your hearts to your bountiful blessings.

Your fears, your critics, your heroes, your villains — they are your excuses, rationalizations, shortcuts, justifications, your surrender. They are fictions you perceive as reality. Choose to see through them. Choose to let them go. You are the creator of your reality. With that empowerment comes complete responsibility.

I chose to step out of fear’s tunnel into terrain uncharted and undefined. I chose to build there a blessed life. Far from alone, I share my beautiful life with Dorothy, my beautiful wife, with our triplets, whom we call the Tripskys, and with the latest addition to the family, sweet baby Clementine.

What do you fear? What lies do you tell yourself? How do you embellish your truth and write your own fictions? What reality are you creating for yourself?

In your career and personal life, in your relationships, and in your heart and soul, your backwards-swimming fish do you great harm. They exact a toll in missed opportunities and unrealized potential, and they engender insecurity and distrust where you seek fulfillment and connection. I urge you to search them out.

Helen Keller said that the only thing worse than being blind is having sight but no vision. For me, going blind was a profound blessing, because blindness gave me vision. I hope you can see what I see.

Thank you.

Bruno Giussani: Isaac, before you leave the stage, just a question. This is an audience of entrepreneurs, of doers, of innovators. You are a CEO of a company down in Florida, and many are probably wondering, how is it to be a blind CEO? What kind of specific challenges do you have, and how do you overcome them?

Isaac Lidsky: Well, the biggest challenge became a blessing. I don’t get visual feedback from people.

BG: What’s that noise there? IL: Yeah. So, for example, in my leadership team meetings, I don’t see facial expressions or gestures. I’ve learned to solicit a lot more verbal feedback. I basically force people to tell me what they think. And in this respect, it’s become, like I said, a real blessing for me personally and for my company, because we communicate at a far deeper level, we avoid ambiguities, and most important, my team knows that what they think truly matters.

BG: Isaac, thank you for coming to TED. IL: Thank you, Bruno.

 

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Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender

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david-hawkins-quote
These two words – Letting Go – are very easy to say but can be challenging to actually do. Some of the things we might be trying to let go include:

  1. Past Events or Behaviors
  2. Fear
  3. Anger
  4. Desire
  5. Grief

lettingn-go-audio140 Letting Go describes a simple and effective means by which to let go of the obstacles to Enlightenment and become free of negativity. During the many decades of the author’s clinical psychiatric practice, the primary aim was to seek the most effective ways to relieve human suffering in all of its many forms. The inner mechanism of surrender was found to be of great practical benefit and is described in this book.


When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.Lao Tzu

Some benefits to letting things, related to the above list, go in your life are: happiness, success, health, well-being, intuition, unconditional love, beauty, inner peace and creativity.

Many of us think the key to happiness and success results from hard work, discipline and commitment, when in reality, many times the secret is surrendering and letting go to reach your goals.

Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender

Here is a brief video of Dr David R. Hawkins giving a A Lesson on Surrender. When asked to describe surrender to a three year old so that they know they are doing it right his response: “Quit trying.”


About the Author:

david-hawkins Sir David R. Hawkins, M.D., Ph.D., is an internationally renowned psychiatrist, consciousness researcher, spiritual lecturer, and mystic. Author of more than eight books, including the bestseller Power vs. Force, Dr. Hawkins’s work has been translated into more than 17 languages.

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It’s Never Too Late to Have a New Beginning

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Denise Linn provides advice on how to prepare and adapt to the changes brought by the New Year.

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cooking-up-fabulous-yearCooking Up a Fabulous Year! Ignite the Most Incredible, Awesome, Glorious Twelve Months of Your Life!

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It’s Never Too Late to Have a New Beginning – Transcript:

I love new beginnings. You know there’s that expression that it’s never too late to have a happy childhood. It’s never too late to have a new beginning.

new-beginnings-2016-newday-gsWhat I love about new beginnings is you can begin to really let go of the past, the past does not need to equal the future. People tend to think, well its always been this way or I have always had challenges. If you have the belief as I do that literally in this moment today you can start anew. The past does not need to equal the future, so it can be.

I love new beginnings. Change is scary and I guess the best way is to know you are going to be scared, and just acknowledge it. You know, yeah I’m scared and I’m starting fresh and new.

Yes, I don’t like change and I am starting fresh and new.

What you resist persist. So if you say, “I don’t want to be afraid, I’m not going to be afraid,” guess what, the fears there it just gets dug in deeper.

But if you face the fear, you know that expression face the fear; do it anyway. Just like I am afraid and I’m stepping forward into the unknown and that is usually what is so scary.

We just don’t know, but to be willing to acknowledge that you don’t know and to step forward and do it anyway. That is an act of power, that is an act of courage and that’s worth while pursuing.

Ceremonies have been done since the beginning of human kind. To literally write down your past, write down these are the events that have happened in my past. This didn’t work. Ugh this was bad. Oh I’m kind of embarrassed about this. Just write it all down. Make a big fire and symbolically say to yourself, say to the universe, “I release the past.”


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The other side of what is so is so what.

It’s not like so what? It’s like so what now!?

Yes, I did that thing. I am kind of embarrassed. You know, make amends, do what you can to fix it, change it; heal it. But then get on with your life.

Just write it all down, roll it up, put it in the paper and as that fire ignites the paper say to yourself:

That’s it!

The past is done.

I am starting fresh.

I am starting new.

This is a new day!


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Denise Linn, the best-selling author of 16 books, has researched healing traditions from cultures around the world for more than 35 years. As a renowned lecturer, author, and visionary, she regularly gives seminars on six continents, and also appears extensively on television and radio shows.


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